Spritzophrenia

humour, music, life, sociology. friendly agnostic.

Why Satanists Should Burn Churches

Posted by spritzophrenia on February 27, 2010

Satanists should burn churches. If they won’t, christians should. A few Satanists have already tried it on, mainly in Scandanavia. Although it’s likely that most of these burnings were simply bored teenagers trying to keep warm. It’s freakin’ cold up there.

I think church burning is a good thing. Apart from buildings with architectural/historical beauty which i kinda like, most of these buildings either have little utility or are easily replaceable. Note that burning churches with people still inside them is extremely bad form.

Churchianity has nothing to fear. If their g0d is real, they will survive and flourish. A buildingless faith will purge and improve churchianity. After all, it started as a buildingless faith, hovering around the temple of the ‘old’ faith and largely meeting in peoples’ houses or catacombs full of dead bones.

In a few hundred years churchianity became so successful that it took over state temples formerly dedicated to Roman gods. And speaking of which, “mergers and acquisitions” is another approach Satanists could take.

I think this church burning thing is a form of jealousy. Satanists are a group of small and kinda disenchanted cults infighting with each other. Just like any other religion. They’re jealous ‘cos they don’t get to have cool buildings dedicated to the propagation of their worldview. Apart from the so-called “Hollywood Satanists” who follow the late Anton La Vey. Brian Warner (aka Marilyn Manson) is a Holywood Satanist. I think the H.S sect probably has enough money to have a building, or maybe a bookshop, or a cute little roadside shrine on Sunset Boulevard. But I digress. Again.

Taking over another religion’s worship places is a well established g0d-thing to do, dating back thousands of years. Take, for example, the muslims. When conquering Byzantium (formerly Constantinople, now Istanbul in Turkey) they took over the Hagia Sofia basilica and turned it into a supermosque. Or the fanatical atheists running the USSR who turned many Russian Orthodox churches into museums or bingo halls. The hostile takeover has a proud and ancient precedent when it comes to competing religious business.

I mean, how cool would it be if in Scandinavia you could find a beautiful old church that’s been painted entirely black and had all the crosses inverted? Hell, I’D go there to worship, and that’s saying something.

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I wrote this before attending the Deicide concert a few years back.

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